Getting a Life [Outside of Class]

Alright, so it’s the third week of school and you still have joined nothing. You’ve tried [if looking on the school website to read about interesting clubs count] but alas to no avail. It seems to be unfair how all your hallmates seem to have some meeting or organization to go to EVERYNIGHT while you sit in your dorm, watching reruns of Friends and Sex and the City.

So what’s a college kid to do?

Get out and meet people! Or go join a club. But how?

1: I’m a Freshman so it’s hard to get into things.

What a crock this is. Seriously, folks, being a Freshman is sometimes the greatest advantage when it comes to doing new things. No one really knows you so you get to do what you want, when you want, and no one really questions it because there is no need to think differently. You’re a new person in a new environment. Thrive on the freedoms it gives you and do not hide under the shadow of unfamiliarity.

Ever have a deep seated desire to give kick boxing or fencing a try but was never given the opportunity nor did it seem to fit your persona in high school? This is the time to do those things!
If you think it’s hard now to put yourself into new situations then thing about how hard it would be when you’re a Sophomore? A Junior? A Senior, even? These will be the times when you have probably established a name for yourself amongst at least a few people and it’ll be even harder to break apart and do your own thing. Just think about that the next time you utter the phrase “but I’m a Freshman.”

I’m not saying that you should reinvent your entire self image if you liked the way you were in high school but this is a time to expand, to grow, to experience the world around you before you have a job, mortgage, kids, responsibilities. Do it before it’s too late.

2: So you want to go out and explore the world!

Let’s start with just the campus first, bud. Better yet, your dorm.

You see, dorms are a schmorge-a-sporge of activities that you can due, especially if you live in a bigger dorm. There are dorm hall get-togethers, mixers [mostly in coed dorms but still], weeks of activities made just for your dorm, student hall council, and even book clubs [and if not, you can always just start one].

For hall get-togethers, this is usually done by your halls Resident Assistant (RA) during certain times of the year. From my understanding, in the first couple of weeks of school, each week represents a different time such as Move-In week, roommate week, etc. And with each week usually comes a specific activity that brings a lot of people together. The RA will design these activities as a way for people of the hall of the dorm to get to know each other better since you will be living together for the next academic year. Take advantage of these things. Go to them, enjoy them to the best of your ability, and be outgoing so that you can meet people. And yes they maybe a little lame but something is only as lame as you believe it to be. If you want it to work out, it will.

Student hall council is another way to both meet more people and to get involved on your campus. And this is definitely one of those times when the “I’m a Freshman so I won’t get it” phrase does not apply. Since most colleges stick the wee Freshman into one dorm, the people going up for council are going to be, you guessed it, Freshman! The only person stopping you from doing it is you. But remember, for things like councils that decide some slightly important things, make sure you’re really going to be dedicated before joining.

As for other advice on how to meet people and get involved, simply leave your bedroom door open [not when you’re sleeping or not there because that’s not very safe]. An open dorm door is like a wrap-around porch in the South; it’s the way your neighbors and you will communicate and get to know one another so leave it open and maybe call out a “hi, y’all” to those passing by.

3: The dorm people are weird . . .

I can understand this one. No one in your dorm seems to have anything in common with you besides your residence location. They’re Kappa Delta and you play snare in the marching band [note: not saying that sorority and band girls cannot mix. I’m using a generalization to emphasize my point]. You like to read books and study and they like to party until three in the morning. Whatever the reason, something is hindering the bond between you and those you share the building with. So now it’s time to venture out.

If you’re living on campus, chances are there a flyers everywhere! In the stairwell, the elevators, on corkboards outside your classrooms, on the stall in the bathroom, everywhere! So take the time out, if you’re not rushing to the lecture that starts in five minutes, and just stop and read. These flyers are chock full of information on meetings, clubs, art galleries, plays, etc. And it’s all waiting for you, usually at little to no cost. So one day when you’re wondering what to do, just stop by a random corkboard, scan the flyers to see what’s going on that day, and pick something to go to.

If random acts are not exactly your thing, then get on your school’s website. Most college websites now have a comprehensive list of the clubs available on campus. Look at this site and search for what you’re interest in. Like to read and discuss books? Then maybe a book club will be good for you and it’ll help you connect with those like you. Maybe Rugby’s more your thing so look up intramural sports and sign up! It’ll be both fun and healthy for you.

If your school doesn’t seem to hold such lists, then look in stead for an Activities Fair, which allows clubs to come and display what they got going on. They’re usually within the first month of school so keep your ears out.

Another way to meet people is simple to talk to the person next to you in class. It’s easy and cost you nothing, time or money. You have to be there anyway so might as well make a friend or two.

If you’re really adventurous, do to breakfast/lunch/dinner/whatever and just sit next to someone you don’t know and strike up a conversation. There are people everywhere. Just say “hello” and see where it takes you.

4: The Greek life.

A lot of people get to college and immediately rush. It’s just their thing. They either always wanted to in high school, know people who are in the respective sororities/fraternities, or it may be a family tradition. Regardless, they take this path and move-in week or the first week of school, they rush for the bigger, nationally known Hellenic Societies, which is all good and well for them.

There are also some people who completely and utterly dislike the Greek Life. It seems stupid, dumb, a waste of time. This is where I say stop on that one. Not all Greek societies are created equal. They’re not all just Barbie Dolls with a high IQ or some muscle headed Neanderthals. And for the ones that aren’t, it isn’t a society filled with “dogs” or the “geeks.” I say you don’t bash on something, no matter the view point, until you try it yourself.

And I know, a lot of people believe that they’re not cut out to be in a sister/brotherhood. Trust me, been there, done all that. This is the cool thing about college when you actually go: it’s not like the movies. These societies no longer just play to a certain playing type but a variety of them. They seem to be striving more for a sisterly or brotherly bond amongst virtually strangers. Also, some societies are based off majors or interest, such as business, so it’s a good way to meet people with common interest and network in your future profession, killing two birds with one stone, so to speak. So before you shoot the Greeks or yourself down, give it a shot.
And for those who believe that you could not afford to join one, I come bearing good news. You can! Some Greek societies are not outrageously overpriced with fees being as reasonable as fifty dollars a month or lower. Now, for these lower priced ones, it usually just means that they don’t have a house, on or off campus, and so do not need to have high prices but still have all the fun activities like dinners, formals, semi-formals, etc. And even more so, some societies are willing to cut the fees down for people who get in but can’t afford it to that extent. So don’t let something like money stop you from doing something.

5: Final Word.

What I’m trying to say to you, my readers, is that while you’re in college, I would highly recommend sampling life. Go out and get interest, hobbies, viewpoints, whatever, that are different than your friends and families, that help you become your own person. Try out things you’d never do before and don’t worry about what others will think. In the long run, it wont matter.

I hope you all have good gun and adventure in college. Questions and comments are always welcomed.

Sincerely,
Ran.